Wednesday, August 25, 2010


This weekend the S's did removals. Removals is the most boring thing I've ever seen. More boring than the S's doing work on their computers instead of playing with me, and more boring than being made to sit whilst your dinner is made (always too slowly). Even the S's didn't like doing removaling. There was a lot of swearing* and grunting# and showing of bumcrack+.

Syd's friend Manuel helped us to move things. I wanted to help too but noone would let me so I just had to watch. Boring.

There was one good part to removals. That was; sitting on all the things that were being removed. If you timed it right, you could manage to sit on a thing just as the S's were about to lift it - that was very good fun. Also going in the truck was OK, but I was a bit squashed (Sarah is a little too fat) and I had to wear my seatbelt and could not lie down comfortably, so I did a lot of fidgeting and big sighs until Sarah got the message and moved up a bit. I was a bit confused actually because we kept putting things in the truck and going somewhere, taking them out, then coming back, then going again. I was not sure where we were going to end up - but finally we went to my favourite new place; the country.

We had an awful lot of things to remove and Syd had a lot of driving to do. I had a lot of waiting to do and practiced doing patience again until I fell asleep.

On Sunday I had to watch the S's carrying a lot of things around again in the new place (and more swearing and bumcrack), and just as I thought it was getting TOO BORING FOR WORDS, something good happened. A new dog just arrived in our garden. I don't know where she came from, suddenly she was just there! She was quite old but very friendly, and she stayed all afternoon to keep me company. She kept sitting where I wanted to sit though, so I kept sitting on her. Sarah said I should stop 'mithering' her and let her sit, but I wanted to play and anyway; why should I leave her alone when she's in my garden eating MY bone? I don't think she will be my new girlfriend (a little bit too old) but I will let her be my friend. I hope she comes again next time we are in the country.....

*by Sarah, unladylike = not acceptable
#by Syd, manly grunting whilst lifting heavy items = ok
+I'm not saying whose; use your imagination.....

When We Were One...........

It was my 1st birthday last week. I have been longing to be ONE, so that I could have a party. Well I had TWO parties! One at home with the S's (a little bit boring, but they tried - we had balloons and cake) and a second party which was in the park with all my friends and was much more fun.

For my birthday I got: 1. A big bone (I have already eaten it), 2. A toy bone that makes a funny noise and is supposed to be indestructable (we'll see about that....) and 3. A new Mr Flea (to replace my old Mr Flea who someone who shall remain nameless but whose name starts with Sa put in the bin because he was apparently 'too manky')....

Kay and my mum Ruby and my sister Gracie came to the party in the park and we had liver cake and peanut butter cookies. Oscar came for a bit, but was taken away by his humans because they could tell he was planning a dive into the canal (not allowed). AND very exciting -  a special guest of honour came as a surprise.....Rupert the Airedale. Rupert is very distinguished, and the S's told me that he is the reason they got an Airedale in the first place. Syd once gave Rupert (and his human Gary) a lift in the car because it was raining, and after Rupert put his head on Syd's shoulder, Syd decided that if he was ever going to get a dog, it had to be an Airedale. I think that's a good story, although I don't know why anyone would ever want any other type of dog really.

So Rupert came and met my friends and played ball for a bit, then he sat and watched us all because he has a poor stiff leg so he couldn't run as much as we did.

Ringo my brother was supposed to come, because he was ONE too, but he had hurt his paw and couldn't make it. We were all very sad about that -especially me because I was outnumbered by bossy girls (until Rupert came). In fact, my mum Ruby was so bossy that she told me off for playing with her toys, and got me in a headlock, and I didn't like that at all. Syd said it was because it was 'that time of the month' and you have to watch out for women around that time.  I don't know what he meant but I certainly will be careful around mid-August in future. These women can be very tricky, I have learned.

Now I am ONE I think I will be allowed to do what I want a little bit more....maybe I will eat when I feel like it and stay up later, and catch rats, and chew up shoes, and sit on the sofa, and NOT have baths. I think that's how it works, right? And the S's and BODGER will have to show me 'respect'. That's what Rupert said - he said older dogs deserve a lot of respect. I am looking forward to that. One day I might even be as distinguished as Rupert.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Christmas in July in August

Well we have had a very interesting weekend with our friends. We did a funny thing. We pretended it was Christmas (it is not Christmas) in July (it is not July, it is August). I was confused about this. I still am. Anyway, apparently we have to do this in Australia because we get Christmas at the wrong time, when it is hot. So.....if you want to do proper Christmas, when it's cold, you have to do it in July. But in August. If you understand that perhaps you can explain it to me? We had to go to the Hunter Valley to do this, because that is where you find wine, and you need wine to have Christmas of course.

Anyway. More importantly it was VERY GOOD FUN. Oscar was there, and Tayla, and all their humans And Victoria, who is my special lady friend. There was A LOT of food (always good) including pigs in blankets and turkey and there was a BIG GARDEN to run in. What else? Oh yes balloons, and Christmas pudding (which Sarah set on fire which was a bit embarrassing, obviously she is not a very good cook).  And there was SANTA. But Santa was Syd. Confusing again.

Oscar was scared of Santa, but Tayla and I were not. We liked him because he was cooking sausages. Actually he set them on fire too- what is it about the S's and their cooking?? They should leave it to the others. But maybe not Jan as he tried to make gravy out of bread when noone was looking; but I was watching him and I saw.  Here is Jan and Jason - drinking wine.  They managed to get a glass before Sarah got to it.

In the Hunter Valley there really  is a lot of wine (Syd says there is even more than Sarah can drink) and you can go around tasting it for FREE. Except dogs may not taste wine, and they have to wait outside. I tasted the fountain instead whilst I was waiting. Oscar wanted to swim in the fountain but his humans said no. Why do humans say NO so much? 

I did get a little bit too excited in all the fun and I accidentally ate something I shouldn't have during Christmas dinner. Syd was chasing me, and I just gulped it down quick so he couldn't get it. Fortunately I threw it up again in the S's room at 4 am. It was one of Tayla's little pink socks. Sarah wouldn't give it back to Tayla, I don't know why. Tayla has plenty of other pink stuff so I don't think she would have even missed that sock. I also tried to eat Santa's beard........

Actually Santa split his trousers when he was showing everyone how to do a 'grapevine'. I think this was something to do with wine as well. I am not allowed to show you a photo of the split trousers.

I liked going away with our friends, especially Oscar. I gave him one of my peanut butter biscuits, and he let me chase him round in circles for ages until we both got dizzy. He is quite fast for a short-legged little chap, and a bit sneaky as he goes through small gaps that I can't fit into. He can also fit under the table without people noticing him, whereas I get  in trouble for that. Mmmm maybe there are benefits to being a little fellow after all.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Airedales All Day

I forgot to tell you about the supergood time I had at the Airedale fun day. I saw all my friends and some new dogs- Airedales of course!  Noah was there; he is cool. We had a picnic and we played football. Syd and I were quite good at football. I also had a go at agility. Syd was not very good at that, and to be honest. Sarah was not much better. But I was very good. I think I have a bit of a knack for it. AND I won a prize and a ribbon for being 'second fastest dog to run to my human'. The human was Syd. I think I would not have come second if the human had been Sarah........I saunter when I am going to her, and sometimes I change my mind and go somewhere else instead. I had a lot of sausages during the day, more than I would ever get at home.

Gracie was showing off at the funday. I think she is a bit too big for her boots actually. She is also 'teacher's pet'; always coming first in things.  My mum Ruby was there but she was busy (also showing off - that must be where Gracie gets it from) so I didn't talk to her much. I hung out with Diesel - he is my brother and I have not seen him since we were very small. He is a really big boy, bigger than me. I liked him a lot. I could tell we were like-minded fellows. He was more interested in girls than me, and I was more interested in food than him, but we made a good team. Neither of us was interested in coming first - that is for girls anyway.

Here is me doing agility with Syd trying to keep up (Sarah was bossing in the background).

I was so tired after our day out I slept all the way home.

We are going to have a Christmas Airedale get together again - I can't wait, BUT I am NOT dressing up. No way, not this year. I will be ONE and it is not dignified to dress up when you are ONE. Unless I can go as Robin Hood......


Today was grrrrrreat! I caught my first rat! Sarah did not think it was great. She said it was 'gross Fozzie', in a very high and screechy voice that hurt my ears. A bit like that voice she uses when she says 'SYD THERE'S A COCKROACH IN HERE'. Women.

Anyway here's how I got the RAT! I was snuffling round in the bushes where I normally find baguettes. I am not supposed to go in there. Or eat baguettes. Anyway Sarah came to find me, and I turned round to look at her........ and I had a rat in my mouth! There are a lot of rat holes in those bushes and I like to put my long nose in them. I knew I'd get lucky one day. She made a big scream, and I was so startled that I dropped the rat on the floor. Then Sarah did another scream because.....the rat was not dead! He started to wander off. This made Sarah run quite fast. It was very funny. I got put on my lead then, and we had to go home. I was in a sort of daze all the way home thinking about that rat. I had to wash out my mouth when we got home. Sarah made me have a big drink of my water until all the rat taste had gone. And then I went to sleep and had rat dreams. Brilliant. I wonder if he'll still be there tonight.....? I have a feeling we might not be going to that park tonight though.

I have referred Sarah to Wikipedia....on there it says all about rats and why we Airedale terriers like to catch them. She needs to be educated that it is OK to let Fozzie catch rats. It's in my genes to catch rats! Have a look..........

''During the middle of the nineteenth century, regular sporting events took place along the Aire River in which terriers pursued the large river rats that inhabited the area. A terrier was judged on its ability to locate a "live" hole in the riverbank and then, after the rat was driven from its hole by a ferret brought along for that purpose, the terrier would pursue the rat through water until it could make a kill. As these events became more popular, demand arose for a terrier that could excel in this activity. One such terrier was developed through judicious crossings of the Black-and-Tan Terrier and Bull and Terrier dogs popular at the time with the Otter Hound. The result was a long-legged fellow that would soon develop into the dog we recognize today as the Airedale Terrier. This character was too big to "go to ground" in the manner of the smaller working terriers; however, it was good at everything else expected of a sporting terrier, and it was particularly adept at water work. This big terrier had other talents in addition to its skill as a ratter......''

Yesterday I hung out with Syd all day. It was great. We had 'man time' and we went mooching. Mooching is when you walk around and sniff things. You stay on your lead and go past the shops, and there are a lot of people who stop and rub you. You put your nose in their shopping, especially if they've got food and you have a good sniff. And you try and trip people up by weaving in around their legs. Syd talks to a lot of people because they ask about me and what kind of dog I am and how old I am. I am a cool dog of course - and I am nearly one.  Oh yes, and then Syd has a burger, which I must not tell Sarah about. Anyway, we had fun all day but then it was spoiled of course as Sarah came home. We went to get her from the ferry. Whilst we were waiting, I heard someone say that dogs must not go on the ferry and secretly I was glad as it looked a bit wobbly on there. Mind you, if I did want to go on the ferry I would just go. Noone could stop me. We didn't go though yesterday, we got Sarah and I jumped on her white jacket with my dirty paws! You have to take your fun where you can get it. Then we went home and she made roast dinner and even though I was really tired I managed to keep my eyes open long enough to have some.

Off now for another snooze and more rat dreams. In my dreams, rats are always villains (like the Sherriff of Nottingham), and dogs (me) are always heros (like Robin Hood).  Except I don't wear tights.